Hi, i'm Billy. I write short stories and other fun stuff
I specialise in chronicle style stories with character consistency throughout.
My current character series "The Tinseltown Trio" consists of 3 completely made up* people.
Stephanie - a middle aged actress from an Eastern Bloc country, who somehow finds herself in all sorts of capers
Rowan - Stephanie's son, constant companion and handsome male model
Dottie - former SAS elite operator, now turned handbag manufacturer
All stories are of tongue in cheek nature and often feature themes not exactly safe for display at the supermarket.
*made up based on friends and family
About Billy
I've been writing and taking photographs since I was 8. A long love affair with books and a wild imagination allowed me to dive into the creative world of writng, with my very first short story "The day the monster ate my street" published in a state wide scholastic magazine when I was 9 years old. The 'monster' inspired by my fathers loud Hino truck at the time.
In adulthood, developing an appreciation for the absurd, macabre and campy plotlines from favourite movies and TV, I started writing again. A hit gift for a friends 40th birthday opened the gateways to what I love to do today, create laughter in an easily digestable short form.
My books
Desperate Houseboys
An over the top, camp murder mystery set at a 40'th birthday party. The theme closely follows the plot style of the 2000's TV series classic 'Desperate Housewives' but with a John Waters style of writing. A classic 'whodunit' with every character a suspect.
This short story was originally written for a friend as a 40th birthday present, with a chapter delivered every month for a year. I am extremely proud of this work, and loved developing the characters so much, I used them in two other short stories.
Attack Of The Seven Foot Hairpieces
7 Foot Hairpieces is the unwanted and unloved sequel we all know comes from Hollywood, but with tongue planted firmly in cheek. After the capers and chaos of the 40th birthday, our 3 main characters flee to a tropical island for some relaxation. As they think everything is alright in the world, suddenly the volcano erupts, dislodging a UFO which had jammed in there 1000 years ago. Out pop 2 EVIL DRAG QUEENS FROM OUTER SPACE, who are now hellbent on taking over the world, capturing all of the handsome men to use as entertainment on their home planet.
This is a short 50 page story but packed with lots of detail and a meandering plot which deliberately leads in different directions, setting up future short stories.
The Newsmaker
The Newsmaker centres around our beloved character Stephanie, and her formative years after escaping the Eastern Bloc country in the boot of a car aboard a ship.
Stephanie is a young aspiring journalist, but stuck in the position of 'buxom weather girl' at a backwater television station, in a town where absolutely nothing happens .So Stephanie decides to 'make some news' of her own, by committing petty crimes and causing mayhem, much to the annoyance of the local police. Then Stephanie 'suddenly' appears on scene to do an on-location exclusive. One day Stephanie witnesses an actual awful crime being committed, and thus begins a game of cat and mouse, to see who gets the 'below the desk exclusive'. This is a very adult themed short story, with lots of saucy scenes not fit for public reading. I had a lot of fun developing the story for this one, really fleshing Stephanie out as a real, raw and flawed human. We see how she becomes the starlet she's known for.
Sorry, We're Open. COMING SOON
This is a break away from the previous characters, written in a telenovela style, inspired by movies such as 'My big fat greek wedding'. We centre around an inner city pasticceria called 'Marchesini Pasticceria'. With Maria, the middle aged daughter of owners Enzo and Vicky. She is a sad downtrodden kind of woman, who's only joy is making the perfect espresso and inventing new desserts for her father to bake, which the gentrified newcomers lap up with relish. This attracts the attention of a local celebrity chef, who asks her to compete on a TV show, much hilarity and chaos ensue.